A Funny Thing Happened on the Way to the Film Shoot

I know what you're thinking: "Oh NOES!! Mister Man is in JAIL!! And the wedding is only one month away!!" Not to worry friends! It was only a film shoot!

You see, last week, when I wasn't working at the world's best day job, I was working with a friend on a music video shoot. Her name is Marie Clements and, well, frankly, she's brilliant. She weaves images into an amazing narrative tapestry and I would crawl over flaming coals, the railing of the Lion's Gate Bridge and a pit of snakes to work with her. So when she phoned and asked if I could join her on a music video shoot, I leapt through flaming hoops to say yes. We did the set-up and a bit of a pre-light last Tuesday night. We were shooting in a warehouse in the downtown eastside, so security was a bit of an issue. Marie and I decided we would sleep there. In our cars. Bless Marie's heart. Because, as the night fell, she cobbled together a little table for us.

And then she put a bottle of wine on it.

Years ago, Marie and I worked in theatre together. We used to love working as we lay about her living room, draped over the furniture like a well worn leather jacket. We fantasized about being able to go to work in our pajamas. We LONGED to work in our pajamas. We joked around that our theatre company would be called Theatre in Pajamas. And FINALLY, here we were, over a decade later, sitting in our pajamas. It was DELICIOUS.

However, as we sat there, we heard sounds. Little scritchy sounds. Not of the "Amityville Horror" variety.... no - more like the sounds from the the movie Ben. You remember the film in which Michael Jackson sang the title track? Involving little four footed creatures with long tails? In any event, Marie and I went screaming into denial. Thank God for the wine. It kept us from teetering on the edge of hysterics. And when the time came, we each retired to our vehicles which were now tucked inside the warehouse. I put earplugs in. Marie chose to go without the plugs. She reckoned that, in the face of a break-in, she should be able to HEAR it so that she could dial 911.

When the alarm went off at 5:30, I awoke to find Marie looking for something. She was searching high and low for her car keys, which had gone missing in the middle of the night. We mapped and re-mapped the route she'd travelled at oh-dark-hour when the sound of the little critters became overwhelming.

In the meantime, we had grand plans in which I drove to Starbucks to get us mondo coffees as big as our heads. And smoothies. And maybe even a muffin. And as the minutes ticked down towards the call time, we still couldn't find the keys.... and out went our grand plans of morning coffee.

Once I'd let go of the morning coffee, all I could think about was getting the first shot. And that wasn't QUITE possible when our vehicles were sitting in the first camera position. Here's a shot taken the night before (when Marie's vehicle hadn't yet been parked in the warehouse. But you can see my car. And I can assure you it's blocking the shot...)

After searching high and low for about 2 hours, Marie finally called the nice people at Hyundai, and they said "well, we're goin' tow that puppy to the nearest dealer so that we can re-key it for you." And sure enough, the tow truck driver showed up about 10 minutes before we were supposed to shoot.

And he towed Marie's truck away.

Bye bye truck. Bye bye!

And throughout all of this, Marie stayed focused and grounded. She spent time with her script and thinking about the day. This is yet one other reason why I admire her.... nothing was going to throw her off her game.

Yup. Nothing threw her off her game, including the phone call in which the nice people at Hyundai called to say "Um. Lady? We found your car keys." "They were on the roof of your car."