But here is the truly marvelous thing, gentle readers. I DID NOT FREAK OUT. Nay. I put Plan C into effect. I was going to make a graham wafer crust (easy and pretty impossible to mess up), and THEN I was going to make 2 batches of the filling, so that we could have one flawless pie with a graham wafer crust, and one pie as god and Teri intended, with the BUTTER PASTRY CRUST.
So I began melting chocolate.
And when Mister Man walked in from his morning of hanging out at a literary festival, I asked if he could please "GO IMMEDIATELY TO THE SAFEWAY AND BUY SOME MORE BUTTER" so that I could keep melting the chocolate as I was fully in PLAN C mode and planned to save the day with my clever ingenuity. And guess what he did? He pouted and he protested and he stomped out to get the butter. And I. FINALLY. FELL. APART. I started sniffling and snorkling and trying not to get my tears in the melting chocolate, as the water would render it useless.
And when he came back from the store, I continued making the filling. And I continued to cry. I made 2 pies. The one with the failed butter pastry crust essentially was
And I filled the graham wafer crust. And I filled the Frankenpie crust. And I crawled in the bathtub which I filled up with my tears.... And then Mister Man brought me a coffee and told me "there, there. I'm sure it'll be delicious."
And you know what? When our wonderful friends Space Girl and Shayne arrived and dined on a truly extraordinary dinner made by Mister Man, they were actually IMPRESSED when I pulled out 2 pies and told them the whole sad saga. And they both agreed to have a slice of each! And THEN they said that the Frankenpie was by far the tastiest. They even asked for a doggie bag consisting of a big hunk of Frankenpie!
That's what friends are for folks.... that's what good friends are for... Good friends will eat your disasters and your successes, and will make you feel really great about even trying.
And here's the most important thing to come out of the Stupendous Pastry Debacle. I'm gonna try this pastry thing again. Cuz I figure I've learned a lesson or two. The only difference will be that next time, the score will be: Pastry 0 - Teri 1. Mark my pastry cutting words.....